Projects

  • Monkey Pudding

    Monkey Pudding was written in 1999 and performed as a tour of preschools and daycares in Vancouver in 2000.

    Two of the poems from the Monkey Pudding project, “Hello There” and “I Wanna”, were recorded as part of the album, Plattapussy.

     

    boom

    shhhhhhhhhhhh

    monkey

    there’s an electric zig zag power snag going ’round my brain.

    boom  boom  boom  ba doop

     

    shhhhhhhhhhh

    pudding

    there’s a sweet tongue tickling tug of war splashing in the rain.

    boom  boom  boom ba doop

    boom  boom  ba boom ba doop

    grrrrrrr  grrrrrr  garaggle

     

    shhhhhhhhhhh

     

    boom  ba  doop a doom  ba doop a doom barrumph

     

    i want to eat you up barrumph barrumph  all up.  all up.  barrumph

    up up, up up, up up and away

    it’s…

    boom  ba  doop a doom   barrumph

    barrumph ba doop  a doom

    barrumph

    there are sad times sometimes

    and sometimes our feelings hurt

    there are glad times sometimes

    and sometimes we want to blurt

    boom  ba  doop a doop doom

    ba  doop  ba doop  barrumph

    boom  ba  doop a doom boom boom

    barrumph  barrumph

    share with me.  you.  all of you.  share with me.  always.  in all ways.

    sad ways.  side ways.  good days and bad days.

    share with me.  amaze me

    you bedazzle all of you

    with love sparks

    share with me whiskers all ways in all ways

    and your shimmering shine

     

    boom  ba doop a doom ba doop a doom

    barrumph barrumph

    ba  doop a doom  barrrumph

     

    shhhhhhhhhh

    monkey!                        pudding!

     

    chant

    monkey!                                                pudding!

    monkey-monkey!                                  pudding-monkey!

    pudding-pudding!                                 monkey-pudding!

     

    you can put it in your shoes

    you can squish it with your toes

    you can smear it on your face

    you can wash it with your clothes

     

    you can throw it at your friends

    you can hide it in your bed

    you can slap it on your bum

    you can feed it to the dead

     

    monkey!                                               pudding!

     

    there’s nothing else that’s quite as gooding

    as good old fashioned monkey pudding

     

    people you don’t like…they like monkey pudding

    those folks you think strange…they like monkey pudding

    it’s makes them stranger, it’s them stronger

    it makes them weirder, it makes them laugh longer

    it’s good to be different, it’s fun to be a freak

    it’s good that your thoughts are the one’s that you think

     

    monkey!                                                 pudding!

     

    there’s nothing else that’s quite as gooding

    as good old fashioned monkey pudding

     

    heroes

    monkey pudding Pete

    had really big feet

    feet bigger than a dinosaur’s bum

     

    and Pete dug his feet

    he liked to walk on the street

    fwip fwap, fwop fweep, fwop fwum

     

    monkey pudding Pam

    had a tongue made from jam

    jam thicker than a marshmallow’s bed

     

    and Pam loved her tongue

    all the songs it did sung

    whoop lee dee da, dum doodle dee ded

     

    monkey pudding Paul

    had hands that were small

    hands smaller than a wee baby mouse

     

    but Paul loved his hands

    they played drums in a band

    poutta pitta, pitta patta, potta pouse

     

    hooray to all our heroes

    who come in many shapes and sizes

    these monkey pudding people

    give us all some wonderful surprises

     

    luuuuuuvvvvvvss

    monkey pudding luuuuuuvvvvvvss

    to be ruuuuuubbbbbbed

    the right way

     

    get ready for good times

    get ready for fun

    put your hands on your belly

    on your tummy tum tum

    wiggle your fingers and lickle your lips

    let out a squeal as you jiggle your hips

     

    monkey pudding luuuuuuvvvvvss

    to be ruuuuuubbbbbed

    the right way

     

    hello there

    hello there man in the moon

    hello there monsieur la lune

    hello there sad funny face

    lonely and hollow crying in space

    i’ll be your friend and i’ll be the one

    who plays games with you instead of the sun

    we’ll play hide and seek when night turns to day

    i’ll be there when it’s cloudy and never run away

    so i’m coming for a visit i’m flying to the moon and

    i’m bringing monkey pudding i’m bringing two big spoons

    i’m bringing two big buckets, we’ll fill them to the top

    i’m bringing all my jokes so the smiles will never stop

    there’ll be clapping and laughing and songs to be sung

    we’ll shout silly things at the top of our lungs

    “SHNEEPY, SHNEEPY, POOH, POOH, BAH”

    “FROOPY, FROOPY, ZOOH, ZOOH, DAH”

    we’ll bang pots and pans we’ll blow balloons ’till they’ve popped

    we’ll make as much noise as we like, then take a nap once we’ve stopped

    and the dreams that we’ll have will make all people happy

    they’ll bump into strangers and say “burga row toing toing va booble va

    bappy”

    so close your eyes. imaginize. fantasize. it’ll be a surpise.

    here i come friend ta ta ta dooooooooooom

    space is our playground za za za zoooooooooooom

     

    music

    last night i saw you making music

    you were playing monkey pudding songs

    the words they didn’t make much sense

    still everyone was singing along

     

    there’s gimble in my snooky there’s trumble in my wak

    the scrumble in the trower looks just like a frikka frak

    the monkey is a pudding and the pudding is a gloop

    the pinto is a pony and the pony is a shloop

     

    wrinkle all the frankles and ruble the up tight

    twinkle all the tangled and fladingle all the fright

    porch the prumblik on yer mimbly tickle twist the oochie loos

    patch the jumble in yer gringles wripple wist the smoochie smoos

    the accordion played it’s ooom pah pah’s

    the bongos bounced out a beat

    marvellous sounds came from marvellous mouths

    people tapped the floor with their toes and their feet

     

    ooom pah  ooom pah  ooom pah pah

    babooomba putta putta pow

    chugga hah chugga hah ratta tat tat

    zazoompah gutta gutta wow

     

    then once the night was over

    when all the monkey pudding playing was done

    some people cried but most of them laughed

    it had been a while since they had so much fun

     

    go go hee hee go go oh my

    whatta whatta whatta wonderful time

    yar yar hooray  yar yar moo mow

    and it all cost us less than a dime

     

    pajamas

    monkey pudding pajamas are wonderful things

    spots winking on flannel

    playing “eye spy” with dreams

     

    “i spy with my winking spot spy

    a marshmallow coloured green

    a horse with an eyepatch

    a wheelbarrow full of laughs”

     

    “yps tops gnikniw ym htiw yps i

    arepo gnignis gorf a

    sklat taht dalas otatop

    eybdoog gniyas fo derit rotovele na”

     

    kerboing kerbong jump jump               jump high

    the pogo sticks are bouncing in town

    hop hop whoop whoop hop hop           whoopeye

    let’s help them pretend to be clowns

     

    commander, there’s no time to explain but someone has just put jello in my pants

     

    that’s not a rooster it’s just james coburn

     

    one day that elevator is going to realize that she’s hungry
    stop!  fudge!

     

    puns

    if monkey pudding was

    a broken boat

    it would be sunky pudding

     

    if monkey pudding was

    rock and roll

    it would be punky pudding

     

    if monkey pudding knew

    how to dance

    it would be funky pudding

     

    if monkey pudding was

    able to talk

    it would be tonguekey pudding

     

    if monkey pudding was

    coffee and donuts

    it would be dunky pudding

     

    if monkey pudding was

    mary tyler moore

    it would be spunky pudding

     

    if monkey pudding got

    bad grades

    it would be flunky pudding

     

    if monkey pudding was

    only found at the dump

    it would be junky pudding

     

    if monkey pudding had

    lived in the 5th century a.d.

    it would be attila the hun-key pudding

     

    santa

    santa’s bringing pudding

    monkey pudding

    just for you and me

     

    santa’s bringing pudding

    monkey pudding

    to put under the christmas tree

     

    pudding that’s gooey, pudding that’s sticky

    pudding that’s jargy, pudding that’s shnicky

     

    santa’s bringing pudding

    monkey pudding

    made by christmas elves

     

    santa’s bringing pudding

    monkey pudding

    to fill the christmas shelves

     

    monkey pudding garboozle, monkey pudding gratingle

    monkey pudding badoozle, monkey pudding babingle

     

    santa’s bringing pudding

    monkey pudding

    because he knows he should

     

    santa’s bringing pudding

    monkey pudding

    to help us all feel good

     

    horky chorky, diggy doozy

    happy thoughts and kindest wishes

    to all the monkeys of the world

    may you be filled by magic dishes

     

    tuba

    alone

    all alone

    all alone in my tub

    all alone in my tub with a tuba

     

    making sweet tuba music

    making sweet tuba sounds

    toobing sweet tuba tangos

    in sweet tuba towns

     

    my tub is a place of magic my tuba is a thing of treats

     

    i can hold my breath for hours and i can float in space and i can juggle bubbles and i can make a tidal wave to splash my sister’s bedroom and i can wrinkle up like grandpa’s belly and i be a submarine and i can be a shark and i can be a whale and i can be a stingray and i can be a jellyfish and i can be a cyclone and i can be a typhoon and i can be a hurricane and i can be an island with buried treasure and i can be a pirate and i can be a speedboat and i can fart underwater and still smell the stink.

     

    and you know i’m not the only one

    it’s easy for anyone to do

    just make a circle with your fingers

    and let the world know that you’re you

    hooooooooo

    ok, ok  that’s good but not quite

    take a deeper breath

    make it last a little longer

    hhhhhhhoooooooooooooooaaaaaaaaaooooo

     

    quite nice quite nice you’re learning very quick

    still i think you need to think like a tuba

    pretend you’re a laugh and let your tummy jiggle

    i think that will surely do the trick

    hoooooooooaaaaaaaaaaaauuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuummmmmmmmmaaaaaaaoooooooeeeeeaaaaaoooo

     

    i’m quite proud of you

    i’m quite proud indeed

    tomorrow we’ll try a trombone

     

    vocab

    oboe dobow day      whoop poo poo

    sleepy jee baw         chop chop faphoo

     

    grrrr grrrr rumble     boo bag dong dicky

    dubba dubba            kerchoo-choo         fing fang fong ficky

     

    fraka fraka

    shucka chaka

    poo-too ping ping

     

    monkey pudding dingle whoop  monkey pudding shingle ding

     

    gratoing!                                       sproink!                                         spladoodie!

     

    putta putta potta

    gabba gooey rump

    morgo jaka fargy

    ningy clompy clump

     

    zargo chomp/chomp chomp

    rrrrruffle

    giddy up

    kersploosh

     

    i wanna

    i want to be happy i want to have fun

    i want life to smell like fresh cinnamon buns

     

    i would love to be silly i would love to be free

    i would love to be a monkey in a giant pudding tree

     

    i yearn to be goofy i yearn to be glad

    i yearn to eat pancakes before they go bad

     

    i need to be quirky i need to be odd

    i need to take showers and act like a frog

     

    i have to have laughter i have to have puns

    i have teeth made from soap so i have bubblegums

     

    i enjoy whistling i enjoy rhyme

    i enjoy pennies quarters nickels and dimes

     

    i want to hug strangers i want to feel love

    i want to make up new words like swingthugglegruv

     

    i don’t want to be angry i don’t want to make sense

    blue coloured chocolates are my real grandparents

     

    i want to throw boomerangs i want to hula hoop

    i want a smile on my face when i have to go poop

     

    i need you to like me and i don’t really care

    i need you to know i’m just glad i shared

     

    whispers

    i have heard the whispers

    whispering

    is it true

    i have heard the doubters

    doubting

    who are you

    to sing to say about the pudding

    monkey pudding

    who are you to say?

    well

    i have played the pudding games

    i have worn the pudding shoes

    i have gone to pudding hospitals

    i have worked in pudding zoos

    i have heard the pudding crying

    i have heard the pudding moos

    i have seen the pudding sadness

    i have heard the pudding blues

    i am me

    the words are mine

    thubba dubba doo badoo

    sproink.

     

    whoop

    whoop whoop whoop

    i think i really like you

     

    whoop whoop whoop

    you really make me laugh

     

    yup yup yup

    i’d truly like to hug you

     

    yup yup yup

    you never take a bath

     

    zoip zoip zoip

    let’s bake a pie together

     

    zoip zoip zoip

    let’s go build a fort

     

    ting tang tong

    i love to see you smiling

     

    ting tang tong

    i want to hear you snort

     

    bang bang bang

    you’re my friend forever

     

    bang bang bang

    you were made for me

     

    clang clang clang

    we all like monkey pudding

     

    clang clang clang

    you’re who i like to see

     

    monkeypooding

    monkey pudding is toilet trained

    an expert at numbers 1 and 2

    monkey pudding knows how to pee

    monkey pudding knows how to…..poo

     

    monkey pudding has no bottom

    there’s no need to worry about wiping

    monkey pudding has no stink

    there’s no need for any griping

     

    splishhhh  lishhh flishhhy bloop

    plop plop, blip blop, ger sploosh

     

    let monkey pudding eat all it wants

    let monkey pudding stay all day long

    then when monkey pudding has to go

    listen to it sing this song

     

    snigga doo ding ding

    ragga foo fang

    marba munch wing ting

    cheeba moo tang

     

    i like to watch the poo go round

    talk to it and say goodbye

    it’s like making yourself a brand new friend

    and have them move at the very same time

     

    boo hoo oh well

    there’s no need for sorrow

    hoo boo pray tell

    there’ll be plenty tomorrow

     

    love

    it’s all the strange and odd and wonderful things

    that bubble and booble deep down inside

    it’s all the magical and moody and mischievous things

    that squiggle and wiggle ‘til you stop asking why

     

    do all the things

    you never thought

    that you’d do

    for no other reason

    than they feel good to you

     

    sleep in satellite dishes and

    send your dreams to the stars

    catch the wind in your arms and

    free butterflies from jars

     

    tell old people they’re loved

    read shy people a story

    pass the puck to a friend

    let them feel the glory

     

    hallelujah hallelujah clap clap hoorah

    it’s monkey pudding love

Add Some Weslowski to your next event Book RC